Last summer, in the wild plains of Montana — far from screens, suburbs and cell service. A group of Trail Life USA Trailmen (as we call the boys in the program) had come to retrace the route of Lewis and Clark, but this wasn’t a museum tour. This was a full-on Corps of Discovery expedition — rugged terrain, primitive campsites, packs on backs, navigating by map and compass, cooking over fires, hauling gear downriver.
They set the goals. They made the plans. They faced challenges — and overcame them together. They grew not just as individuals, but as brothers. As a team.
They carried gear in their canoes — and sometimes on their backs. But whether they realized it or not, they were also carrying something deeper: the quiet, unspoken questions every boy is seeking to answer.
A generation without a map
A boy doesn’t usually say it out loud. But he’s always asking: What’s the mission? Who’s in charge? Who’s with me?
You’ll see it in the way he sizes up his coach. In how he mimics his older brother. In the way he pushes boundaries — not to be bad, but to find where he fits. Boys don’t crave chaos. They crave clarity.
And when we fail to give it, they drift.
That’s the quiet crisis we’re facing with American boys today. And we’re not talking about it nearly enough.
Over the last decade, boys have been falling behind academically, socially and emotionally. They’re more anxious, more isolated and less motivated. Young men are checking out of college, of work, of life. And under it all is something deeper than boredom or rebellion: confusion.
Our culture has grown uncomfortable with masculinity. We reward stillness, punish motion and treat risk as a pathology. We flatten distinctions between boys and girls and then wonder why so many boys seem lost.
But this isn’t just about identity. It’s about purpose. And I saw that firsthand last summer.
A campfire in the wild
On the Corps of Discovery Expedition in Montana, one of the Trailmen — a quiet, unassuming 15-year-old named Ricky — was elected Patrol Leader. His patrol included two older, more experienced boys who easily could have taken charge. But they didn’t. They saw something in Ricky. And they chose to follow.
As we moved through the wilderness, Ricky didn’t bark orders. He listened. He planned. He served. When challenges came — and they did — he stayed calm. He inspired confidence. And by the end of the trek, his patrol wasn’t just a group of guys on a trip. It was a team. A brotherhood. The kind that lasts a lifetime.
That’s what happens when boys are given real responsibility. When they’re trusted to lead and supported by men who believe in them.
Purpose over perfection
The transformation I saw in those boys wasn’t accidental. It didn’t come from a lecture or a YouTube video. It came from challenge, structure and shared mission. It came from putting boys in a place where they could try, fail, get up and grow.
That’s what boys are wired for — not ease, but meaning.
That’s why those three questions — Who’s in charge? Who’s with me? What’s the mission? — are the same questions that gangs, online radicalizers and toxic influences know how to answer. It’s not that boys want danger. It’s that they want to belong. Significance. Brotherhood.
And if we don’t offer them a healthy version, they’ll find a twisted one.
We still have time
The good news is this: it’s not too late. Boys haven’t changed. They’re still full of potential. But they need men willing to show up, not to criticize, but to call them up.
You don’t have to be a perfect dad or an expert mentor. You just have to care. Show up. Stay present. Give them structure, encouragement and opportunities to lead. Because no program, podcast or policy can replace the presence of a man who believes in a boy and walks with him through the wild.
So, let’s stop asking, “What’s wrong with boys?”
And start asking, “What are they made for?”
Because boys are still asking those questions.
And the world still needs them to hear the right answers.
Mark Hancock is the CEO of Trail Life USA, a character, leadership, and adventure organization that is both Christ-centered and boy-focused. Trail Life USA partners with churches and parents across America as the premier national character development organization for young men, which produces generations of godly and responsible husbands, fathers, and citizens. In over 1,250 churches in all 50 states, and over 60,000 members, fathers and sons are connecting, relationships are deepening, and legacies are beginning as a new generation of godly leaders rises.
