When I was excommunicated from the Mormon church just over a year ago, I was widely quoted as saying, "Don't leave. Stay, and make things better." Many felt that asking women to stay in a church that doesn't value them as equals was confusing and dangerous. While probably true, at the time I was torn. I didn't want them to succeed in forcing us out of a space we had fought so hard to claim.
Just this past week a young woman, heartsick and exhausted over the treatment of LDS women, contacted me for advice. She remembered my thoughts to "stay and make things better," and was determined to do just that. However, when I originally made that statement, I, too, was hurting and exhausted. I hadn't had time to experience the wonderful resolution and beauty that exist outside of Mormonism. It is a refreshing discovery to experience the easy peace that comes when you stop struggling to reconcile your heart with a faith community that devalues you. I let her know that staying is not the only honorable choice.
Read Full Article »